Specifically, would you like to buy a book of my writing, most of it new-to-all, pretty much right away?
EVEN MORE SPECIFICALLY, would you like to send me $12 for a right'n'proper locally-printed copy of THIS BOOK?
YES: That is Falsehoods, Concerns by yours truly. YES!
The book contains the following
220 180 pages of PURE 100% MAGIQUE:
- A house, a bay (oceans, curtains, scalar incomprehension)
- There is a shiny brass lamp nearby. (dungeons, Watergate, Floyd Collins, terrors)
- Little Smoo goes to the library (marital friction, children, Galatea 2.2)
- Pregnancy, possibility (sex, swollen uteri/bellies)
- 'In the tomb...' (live music taping, media archaeology, inappropriate titles)
- Kids today. (nerd gaming, obvious stylistic ripoff of David Mamet)
- light is growing brighter now (...)
- love/hate (the difference between them)
- Muddlemind (memory, identity, unknowingly rewriting other people's movies)
- No flash, no fuss (ATHEISM IS BORING! THANK GOD!)
- There are no teenagers (possibly the titular claim is incorrect?)
- Classroom logics (I get so, so, so angry about classrooms!)
- FIXING YOU (excerpts) (my greatest achievement - original semifiction!)
- Panoply (more original semifiction!)
- Five ('I fall in love too easily')
- Nails (I pull mine)
- Hillary Clinton (this one took it out of me)
- Fraud (obvious stylistic ripoff of DFW)
- Notes on 'In a Silent Way' (seriously, just figure out for yourself what this is about)
- Fun-Loving High School Kids! (zany fiction about high schoolers! and mass murder!)
- The Going Concern (bits and bobs about, among other things, love)
- Amen (more stuff about love, you feel me?)
Hey, I'll ship you a copy anywhere in the U.S. for $12. Multiple copies, internat'l shipping, that sort of thing - we'll figure something out.
My address is email@example.com. Drop a line and we will make this happen to your mind; once I've got a sense for the number of copies we'll need, I'll email you with info on PAYOLA and SHIPPING-OLA.
Tell your friends! They stand to benefit most from this kind of brain-rearranging wisdom/nonsense.