The 3-year moving average of HowMuchILikeFireWorks has decreased monotonically since I was a kid. Insofar as I can be said to be politically aware at all, since the dawn of my political awareness (basically college - when I noticed that politicking was something that people my age did, as opposed to thinking it the activity of people much older and untouchable) I've found them almost soporofic. Last night for Boston's famous 4th of July fireworks display I celebrated with a bottle of bourbon and the company of plenty of friends, but here's what the fireworks left me thinking, and yes these are perhaps old jokes by now but whatever:
- The sky over Baghdad looks like this year-round, dunnit?
- Modern country music suffers from an aesthetic poverty isomorphic to that of modern hip hop.
- It's also wildly inappropriate for accompanying fireworks.
- Americans really love to watch shit blow up, don't they? As long as it's, y'know, NIMBY. Same as most everything else they love.
- Telling jokes about 'Thank you to acid!' during the fireworks is only cool if you're actually on acid.
- Probably it's people in general who like to watch shit blow up. Though I can't imagine last night's show going over as well in many other parts of world - the cock-waving jingoism and faux-macho military hardware act notwithstanding, there's just something tawdry about this ostentatious display of Fire and Light when it's so untouchable and sanctioned and one-off. There's nothing organic about this celebration, and it has absolutely nothing to do with a shared sense of history and hard-won liberty.
- The experience is a lot more exciting if you have a decent stereo. We didn't. Sigh.
- Freedom, democracy, bombs! Sweet! I mean there's a real 'broad side of the barn' feel to comments about Americans' pathetic fascination with displays of military might and pyrotechnics. In a country where we pride ourselves on the non-artiness of our film tradition (Hollywood film arose from a populist roadshow/comedy tradition distinct from the cosmopolitan, transitional-media vibe of early Euro cinema - the Europeans inherited many norms from their theatrical tradition, but American movies started out a lot more indie rock style), it's embarrassing that the thrill of watching fireworks so closely approximates the thrill of our bestselling films (how many readers saw Titanic more than once?). Last night John Williams conducted the Pops in a performance of the original Star Wars concert suite, and it was the most perfect thing (not just because it's his signature concert tune): the theme to that film remains one of the most universal melodies among people my age. A film score. About interplanetary war, black-and-white heroes and villains, and the triumph of simple spirituality over intellectualism and technocracy (plus a handy illustration of the value of Shooting First). No wonder we have such a hardon for that film 28 years on: it speaks to today's ruling class temperament! And the other classes? Well, we've got hundreds of years of experience at sitting there and taking it.
- Fire pretty, music loud!
And to the police and the state of Massachusetts with their strict enforcement of puritanical, draconian laws fundamentally antithetical to the spirit of yesterday's 'celebration': to hell with you. Thanks for the fire, I suppose, and the people of Cambridge and Boston who did not quite make it to the show on account of working, not having a home, etc. ... well, they thank you for the fire as well. You can't feed it to your kids but still everybody knows it's so goddamn awesome.
You're probably the only person I know who can be sincerely cynical about fireworks.
Posted by: MRhé | 05 July 2005 at 09:56 AM
Wally, lighten up. They're just fucking fireworks. Have you stopped enjoying life altogether?
Posted by: Laurie | 05 July 2005 at 12:45 PM
Sir! First things first, fireworks are pretty lights in the sky. And the other estadounidenses and I think that's O-K. Second, while you might have thought that the celebration was inorganic and stupid and had nothing to do with liberty, your way of celebrating July 4th (bitching about how other peoples' celebration sucked and yet again drinking yet another bottle of bourbon (not getting old yet, is it?)) was also pretty, well, pointless.
Yes, despite my glaring lack of qualifications for blog-immortality, I understand the irony of bitching about bitchiness. But doesn't the Good Book say an eye for an eye?
Posted by: Phil | 05 July 2005 at 04:16 PM
Phil: Yes it's gotten old. I didn't drink the whole bottle. And I don't mind inorganic crap that has nothing to do with liberty...but there's a lot of shit going wrong, and even a strong believer in the redemptive power of fantasy (like me) should be able to point out the sad selectivity of our national consciousness.
Mike: Nuh-uh!! Probably lots of our circle could be cynical. They just couldn't sustain it up to the blog-posting moment. ;v)
Laurie: Nope! I had a good time and everything, seeing people. The celebration of the birth of our proud republic was nothing more than that: a chance to see friends. I'm sorry I can't get a hardon for 'giving it up for the troops' or whatever it is we're supposed to be doing to show we're 'real Americans'. The music is lame and the fireworks are just fireworks, and honestly the climactic round of bursts seemed perfunctory and rushed, and I think fighter jets have better things to do than remind Bostonians of the thousands of people dying senselessly in a desert halfway around the world.
In a few days I'll likely feel more relaxed about the whole thing. But I don't have to pretend the whole thing isn't lame. I wouldn't expect anyone else to.
Posted by: Wax | 05 July 2005 at 04:58 PM
personally, i don't need bourbon to be cynical about fireworks and such, which i have been for years. i was drinking V-friggin-8 last night!
Posted by: agi | 05 July 2005 at 06:18 PM
"But I don't have to pretend the whole thing isn't lame. I wouldn't expect anyone else to."
Most people aren't pretending.
Posted by: MRhé | 06 July 2005 at 10:17 AM
Since modern black powder is approximately 15% charcoal, I would argue that fireworks are distinctly organic.
Suck on that, you whiney biatch!
Posted by: Goliath's Daddy | 06 July 2005 at 12:57 PM